...New York was a frozen hell

'So, how cold was it?' Cold. Really damn cold.

'But you're from Estonia! You should be used to-' No! This is not how it works! Cold is cold, no matter where you're from. Besides, there's a difference between Estonian cold and New York cold. See, in Estonia you expect the cold. Sure, it's harsh and everlasting but it's the devil you know and you kind of know how to handle it. Oh yes, it might get worse every year but by now I'm already on to its tricks. Estonian winter is kind of like like... dying of cancer... It's a slow and painful process that gets gradually worse until you think you can't bear it anymore... then it get's better for a moment, just to trick you into believing the worst is over. And then it comes back full force and sucks the life out of you until there's nothing left except depression and misery... The snow is pretty, though!

New York cold, however, is like getting stabbed by the Kool Aid Man. It bursts through your wall, wrecks your shit and shoves a knife into your face, kidneys and private parts so that all that's left of you is a bloody pulp on the floor. Then it comes back with a bucket of salt to pour on your wounds and after that it lights you on fire. Except the fire is freezing cold. Is it worse than the cancer-cold of Estonia? Yes. Yes, it is. You can kind of learn how to deal with cancer. You cannot learn how to deal with a salt covered flaming knife in your face.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. The year: 2015. The place: New York. Time of the year: winter, February to be more precise. Honestly, the whole trip came out of the blue. One evening I was sitting at home, relaxing, when my mom calls and goes: 'Hey, we're going to New York!'

'Uh... what?'

'Your sister and I have been looking at tickets. Is February ok for you?'

'I... have school but... sure, I guess I'll make it work?'

And a moment later we already had the tickets. Now, we didn't do much planning for the trip. We were going to be there for about ten days - to me it seemed like such a short time but I did have school so it was for the better. I already had to skip two very important classes and had to work my ass off to make up for it... but that's another story. The tickets were not too expensive and we got a place to stay for relatively cheap - I guess people don't really go to New York in February (spoilers: there's a reason for that). 

The flight to New York was... awful. But that's to be expected from a 12-hour flight. Or was it 11? Doesn't even matter: it lasted forever. The first thing that happened after we arrived in the airport was that we got jumped by a taxi driver who basically grabbed our bags and threw them in his trunk before we even had time to react. Being sleep-deprived, dehydrated and semi-comatose, we didn't have the energy to start an argument so before we knew we sat in an unmarked taxi heading... god knows where. I honestly thought we were going to get stabbed or shot and dropped into a ditch on the way. Welcome to the US! During the whole drive my mind was racing as I was trying to figure out if I had anything in my purse that could be used as a weapon if bad came to worse. Of course I didn't. My Swiss army knife was in my suitcase in the trunk of the taxi and the most threatening item in my carry-on bag was a pair of earplugs. I guess I could use them for strangling...? I've obviously seen too many horror films and crime shows. Against all odds the driver actually brought us to the right place and the fare wasn't all that bad. We learned later that it was 10 dollar more than the usual fare but we didn't even care at that point. 

Our 'hotel' was the weirdest place I've ever stayed at. It was basically just an apartment building... There was an 'office' for the 'hotel' right after the mailboxes but it was closed. 'Back at 11:00 am' the sign read. It was 2 pm... Also, the office was unlocked and littered with boxes. We walked around the lobby for a moment, utterly confused and getting a bit irritated, until some random guy with an envelope showed up, handed us a key and told us to go to the second floor. 

To be fair, our room was pretty nice. There was enough space for our suitcases, a kitchen equipped with a water heater, stove and microwave, a TV, a pretty big bathroom and we had wifi. Not for the first night though. There was a problem with the router so we couldn't connect to it - drove my sister half mad as she was desperately trying to go online. I've never seen anyone so panicked about not having wifi. But the best part of the apartment? It was right on top of a wine store. Yup, just down the stairs to the right was a small shop with a surprisingly vast selection of wines. 

After a good night's sleep and a hearty breakfast in a local diner just down the street, we got a map out and decided to look around... only to realize that New York was a frozen wasteland where nothing could survive. Yes, I'm being dramatic but even for me - someone who knows what to wear and what to do to battle the cold - it was excruciating. I had three layers of pants on, two sweaters and my warmest winter coat and I was still freezing. Every minute outside was torture. And as we were walking along 5th avenue I felt like my fingers and toes were about to fall off. And my mom wanted to take pictures.
 To be honest, I understand her completely... now. A new city, a new country and New York is quite interesting, really... Of course she'd want to take in as much as she could and I have to admit she took some pretty amazing pictures. But I couldn't really appreciate it when my legs were going numb from the cold and my eyelashes were getting stuck together. I had on nuclear winter clothes and I was still slowly dying. And thus I was acting like a kid again. 'Moooooom, let's go inside!', 'Moooooom, it's cold!'. 'Mooooooom, stop taking pictures!' Really though, it was so cold that the fountains looked like giant ice sculptures and everybody on the street was just running from one store/restaurant to another, trying to get a moment's respite. In hindsight I was kind of a brat... but it was really cold!
The city was still beautiful though. Even with the snow and the ice and the cold and everything else... there was always something to see. The first day was all about exploring our surroundings. Our apartment was actually quite close to the Empire State Building - it took us about 5 minutes to get there on foot - and a bunch of other landmarks were just a short walk away. Had it been just a tiny bit warmer it would have been way more awesome. It was so cold that I had a hard time taking pictures: removing my glove was as good as putting my hand into a fire. Oh, and of course I'd forgotten my hat. To be honest I didn't think I'd need one since it was New  York, not Estonia, and my coat had a pretty nice hood... I was wrong.
Thankfully a chance encounter on the first (?) day brought a hat to me. We just happened to pass some sort of set where a bunch of people were filming something. The guy who stopped us from wandering into it struck up a conversation, asked us where we were from and after a short exchange decided to give me and my sister matching NYC hats. They weren't glamorous or good-looking but we had fun with them in our apartment later as we were drinking our 'Three Blind Moose' wine (we bought it solely based on the label... it just looked awesome).
Now, I'm not going to go on and on about what we did during those ten days but suffice to say that even though it was cold as hell, the trip was still amazing. We walked through most of Manhattan, took a ferry to Staten Island, visited Chinatown, Little Italy, Brooklyn, Central Park and so, so many other places. But most importantly, I realized a dream I'd had since I was little: I saw 'Phantom of the Opera' on Broadway. And it was SPECTACULAR! It is still one of the most vivid memories I have about the trip and I still slip into a happy daydream whenever I remember it. At least that's one thing crossed off the bucket list... Also, I think that was the first (and hopefully last) selfie I've ever taken on my own accord. I was out of my mind with joy apparently.
So, my trip to New York was like... riding a roller coaster. You really want to go and you know it's going to be awesome and after it's over you feel alive, excited, bursting with energy and you'll probably want to go again. But while you're on the coaster you feel terrified and just want it to stop. In a way my trip was like that. I didn't want it to stop but I do feel like I couldn't appreciate the awesomeness while I was there. Had it been Spring it would have been great. But nuclear winter New York is like a glacier: beautiful and majestic but so damn cold. Maybe one day I'll be back and will be able to make the most of it. Until then I'm left with memories of spending almost an hour slowly dying of hypothermia in a sightseeing bus. You know those things don't have any kind of heating and an open roof? We didn't... until we got on... But hey, here's a pretty picture of the view from the Empire State Building (it's way colder up there than on the ground, by the way... learned that the hard way).