...surf wasn't up

Are my blog posts getting lamer as I go along? I feel like they are... Guess I'm getting old.

So, have I ever told you guys about the time I tried to surf? Of course I haven't! Because I failed at it. Hard... But what do you expect from an Estonian? I live on the coast of a 'sea' that is more of a really salty lake than anything. People only wind-surf here and I'm way too lame to do that. Also, I don't like to be out when it's windy.

While I was visiting my friend Mary in Hawaii last year, I got talked into trying out surfing. Now, I have previously stated that I don't like the ocean – it terrifies me. Especially waves. One of the first times I went swimming in Hawaii I got slammed by the waves so hard I thought I would drown in knee-deep water, just because I couldn't get up anymore. It was like being stuck in a washing machine. So going into the ocean to catch waves seemed insane. By the way, did you know that sharks have terribly poor eyesight and to them surfers look like sea turtles from below... sharks eat turtles... I'm just going to leave this little fact here. To be fair, sharks don't actually eat people – they are just curious and want to try out new things... with their teeth... After they have taken a bite out of a human they usually decided they're not interested and move along. But the blood draws other sharks who all want a little taste and there's only so much human to go around...

But I'm not here to talk about sharks – I wanted to talk about surfing (although those two topics can be pretty closely related). The first time I tried to surf in Kauai I failed... pretty hard. I was terrified of the waves, couldn't even get onto my knees on the board and I was not dressed for the occasion. The waves were so strong that every time I fell I would almost lose my bikini top. It's kind of hard to concentrate on surfing when you're constantly having to worry about pulling a Janet Jackson (my god, my references are outdated!). The waves were also pretty big, at least for me, so my first attempt at surfing failed pretty hard.

 The second time I tried was in Oahu. Me, Mary and her mom decided to take a little time off and jump to the next island for a bit. We took this opportunity to do some shopping and enjoy some Japanese food because there are only a few Japanese restaurants on Kauai and we were craving some Genki sushi. After our Japanese-food tour Mary suggested we go surfing. I... wasn't too keen on the idea but apparently the waves is Honolulu were much more surfable – whatever that meant. They were beginner-waves: not very big but went on for ages so you had plenty of time to try to stand. Well... I didn't think I had much of a choice so I went for it.

The beach in Honolulu was certainly... different. There were a lot of people and just a throng of surfers clustered around a certain spot in the water. And the water itself...? It was kind of gnarly. I was used to the clear blue waters of Kauai so this... this made me feel uncomfortable. The water was... milky looking. It was strangely warm and incredibly cloudy, looking more like a blue milkshake than anything... I was not sure I wanted to know why it was like that.

Mary had been right though: the waves were much more manageable, they didn't throw me around like a rag-doll and I managed to catch a few good ones and almost stand up. That doesn't mean I was successful, however. As soon as I tried to stand on my feet I would either fall off the side or the wave would die, leaving me crouching on the board, looking like an idiot. One time I almost got up but I guess I was too close to the edge of the board. I fell face first into the water, sliding along for a little bit until going under, my nose, eyes and mouth filled with gnarly milk-water. If they'd given out medals for 'longest face-surf' I'd have gotten the gold.

About an hour passed and I started to feel the burn on my skin but it was still too early to leave. I decided to try and catch another wave. I managed to catch one and even tried to get up. It seemed like a short one though and as soon as I felt it die away I got back down... except that I was wrong. It was still going on. 'This is it!' I thought, 'I'm finally going to stand up!' So I pushed myself upwards again... only to feel it die away again. Dissappointed, I started to get down again... only to feel another push propelling me forward. 'Really? Make up your mind, ocean!' I thought angrily and tried to get up. I managed to get my feet flat on the board, let go of the board and for a moment I felt like I could do this 'surfing' thing.

And then the wave died away. There I was: crouching on the board, just slowly floating forward, frozen in place. And then I fell to the side and hit the water with a hollow splash. Well, I almost surfed... almost. I was so close. Stupid wave! Honestly, if it hadn't died away I would have totally nailed it. But hey, at least it was a start. The rest of my time on the beach was spent in a bar where I sipped cocktails and had the best nachos I've ever had – with ahi tuna and sriracha mayo. Yup, that was way more 'me' than surfing. I'm not going to say I'm never going to do it again. I probably will. I will most likely fail again. But hey, at least I can check that off my bucket list. And when in Rome...